Being a rock critic sho' nuff has its share of perks: piles of free CDs, a calendar packed with star-studded concerts, and interviews with artists whose work makes the long strange trip from cradle to grave a little more bearable. The downside of the critic gig comes when a favorite band releases an atrocious album of half-baked riffs and lackluster lyrics that shouldn't be sold without a package of No Doz to keep listeners from nodding out after the third song. Such is the sad, but true, case of the Black Crowes, Atlanta Georgia's gentlemen purveyors of southern-fried, Rolling Stones-inspired rock 'n' roll. The Crowes' new CD Lions is bound to dishearten fans who thought the band's creative cocktail had been refreshed following the success of 1999's By Your Side disc and last year's tour with superstar guest guitarist Jimmy Page that produced the much-talked-about double album of Led Zep cover tunes Live at the Greek. At last, it appeared that the Crowes had returned to the greasy, groovy songwriting that defined their debut disc Shake Your Money Maker and were once again a road-ready cast of nasties worthy of Melody Maker's praise that they are "the most rock 'n' roll, rock 'n' roll band in the world."

What a difference a year makes. Lions is nothing to roar home about. It's as ramshackle, plodding and forgettable as their Three Snakes and One Charm and Amorica albums, both of which had previously epitomized the Black Crowes at their stoned-out, unfocused, hippy-dippy worst. From the opening feedback squeak of "Midnight from the Inside Out" to the comatose closing of "Lay It All on Me," Lions is an hour-long lullaby with barely five minutes worth tapping your boot heels to. After repeated listening sessions, determined to find something good to say about the damned thing, I can safely say that "Come On" is the hottest of Lions' thirteen tepid tracks and "Soul Singing" has the heartfelt appeal and soulful groove of an "Exile on Main Street" outtake. The rest of the album? As they say in Brooklyn, forgetaboutit, which believe me, won't be hard to do.